Tie Me Up To The Radiator

I just herd something that sounded a whole lot like a crash outside. But more like a car driving through a garage door kind of crash. There's no chance of me getting up to investigate, though. All I know is that it didn't sound close enough to cause me any real worry. It came out of nowhere, though. It was definitely an odd crash. I didn't hear anything until right before the crash. But even though I'm writing all this, I'm not the least bit interested in getting up to see what happened. What I would like to talk to all of you about is these eye drops I've been taking, though. First off, it's probably one of the most difficult things in the world for me to get into some sort of routine for taking medicine. I'm never really sick, or infection-ridden, so when I am prescribed some sort of medication, I find it difficult to keep up with it. Especially when I'm supposed to be taking it every four hours four times a day. But whatever, it's not too big of an issue. I'll tell you what the worst part about these eye drops are, though. That would happen to be after I drop them in my eyes and they make their way past my eyes, and down into the back of my throat. Eye drops do not taste particularly pleasant, and I don't like having that taste in the back of my throat every four hours. Or rather, whenever I remember to put in the eye drops. But enough of that. How about that I go in for my first day of work on Saturday? Sure, it's only a four hour shift to get all my paperwork and whatnot filled out, but it's still kind of exciting. You know, I think I'm looking forward to the 40 minute commute to work a little bit. I love driving a whole lot, and I'm at peace just driving somewhere and singing along to some good tunes on the way. I don't know if that will translate well when my destination involves me catering to a legion of nerds, but I'm fairly optimistic about the whole thing.

Speaking of jobs, I have a humorous story that occurred at my previous job of catering to a different breed of nerd (I was a dealer of pop music at my local FYE). I remember it was a fairly slow day, and there was probably only two or three hours before we were going to close up shop. Well there was this lady rummaging through the store. She had some sort of cart with her, that if I remember correctly, looked a lot like a baby carriage, but without a baby. My manager told me to keep an eye on her, because she looked fairly sketchy. So I pretty much just went out on the sales floor and ignored her. But at one point this woman goes up to my boss, and asks if she could use our bathroom. Now we weren't supposed to let customers use our bathroom anyway, but there was no way my manager was going to let some sketchy lady go in the back room so she could rob us blind. So Steph, the manager, politely told her that she couldn't use our bathroom, but informed her of where she could find a public restroom in the mall. But this woman didn't take Steph's advice and just told her that she was going to "walk it off." I think trying to walk off your need to piss is very counter-productive, but alright. So this woman continues browsing for a while, and then goes up to pay for whatever movies, music, and whatever other entertainment she could find in the store. So my coworker Nick was ringing her up, and everything was going as it normally does. Nick hands the woman her purchases, and this is when the woman leans in to tell him that she "had a little accident in the comedy movies section." At first, this didn't really click with Nick, so he inquired as to what she meant. So she straight up told him that she pissed all over the carpet in the last aisle. This left Nick almost speechless. All he could manage to get out was a studdered "Oh... O...kay." But before this woman left, she felt it necessary to ask poor Nicholas where she could go to purchase a clean, new pair of pants. First of all, this woman needs to show a little more shame. And second of all, she's in a mall. She's surrounded by places where she can buy pants that aren't covered in piss. I mean... as long as she avoids Sears. So once the creepy woman was good and gone, Nick came over to tell Steph and me what the woman told him. Being the person that gets off on the misfortunes of others, I had myself a good laugh. Although, I made it clear that I was going to take no part in the cleanup process. Steph, on the other hand, seemed to have a bit more of a meltdown. Now she's a little thing, but she can sure throw a big fit. And this, honestly, just had me in even more hysterics than I was already in. But eventually Steph calmed down a bit, and started making some calls to other stores. She had no idea how to clean up piss from the carpet, so she was hoping some other FYE manager was more versed in proper urine sanitation etiquette. Well it turns out that none of them were experts in the field of removing carpet stains caused by bodily fluids. There was one manager that claimed to be, though. And Steph was more than happy to take his or her advice. And that advice was to simply clean it with bleach. Good call, Captain Clean! So Steph, without letting anyone else know what her plan was, grabbed the bleach from the back room, and went to town on that stain. After I found out her cleaning method, I politely informed her that bleach was going to do a number on that carpet. And it turns out I was absolutely right. The area of carpet where the bleach was used never matched the carpet around it from then until the store was shut down. It was a lasting memorial to the lady that pissed on our floor. I guess that's what it means when someone who has to pee tells you they're just going to "walk it off." But the rest of that night was great, because you see, Steph has a very low tolerance for things going wrong while she's working. And whenever things do go wrong, she ignores the rest of the normal work duties for the night, and just makes sure we get out of the store as fast as possible. This is one of the better stories I have from that job. It was actually a pretty good up until the first store manager (who is my manager again at this new job) left. Then it just turned into a miserable job that made me wish I was dead.

Alright. Enough with all of this job talk. I have class in the early PM, and I don't like all of my responsibilities being on my mind all at once. Which reminds me that I need to put those eye drops in again. Also, if this entry ends up riddled with mistakes in grammar, it isn't my fault. For some reason my browser is being very choppy, so everything I type isn't showing up as I type it. It's pretty frustrating, but what are you going to do? Alright. Well I'm going to go put those drops in, do a little bit of reading, and then I'll be hitting the ol' hay. I'll see all of you cuties tomorrow!